Say What’s Real

The more I get older, the more I start to see how much we are all faking it. This is not a sad post, but rather an observant one. People, including myself, put up this mask of everything being put together and create this false reality that they want to present to the world. Growing up, I would look at people older than me and see them as those who had their shit together. That couldn’t be further from the truth. Continue reading “Say What’s Real”

Mom

My mom loves to talk about me growing up. The term, “problem child” comes up from time to time when she starts reminiscing. It’s interesting when she talks about raising me. She does it with love in her voice almost as though she appreciates the little girl that I was, including the troublemaker in me that would surface now and again. My mom says she could have done without some of the drama that I put her through, but she would never go back to change a thing. That’s the kind of woman she is. She’s a constant nurturer, as most mothers are. She loves so hard, without any inhibitions. That’s probably where I learned to love the way I do. Probably one of my more redeeming qualities, thank you for that mama. Continue reading “Mom”

Turn on the Light

Forewarning, this post seems like an entry out of a moody teenager’s diary, but that’s what I’m feeling like. So, here it goes. I feel so sad and lonely and hurt right now, because I miss someone who has been in my life since the beginning of their existence. I was there for their first breath, first tears, first word, first steps, first crush, first heartbreak and whatever else firsts you want to add. We were so close. At least I thought so. Then one day I get a phone call that this person decided to leave a note saying,

“Family, you’ve taught me everything I need to know. Now it’s time for me to go out into the world and be on my own. I love you.” Continue reading “Turn on the Light”

Let’s Runaway

I have grown up in a world that has made me feel that I need to do things that fit into the “norm”. This pressure sometimes came in the form of well-meaning parents who never wanted their daughter to bring shame onto the family name, but at the same time try to find some sort of happy medium for me as well. Somehow, in trying to please them, I went further and further away from myself. At other times, it was society boxing me in and telling me what was expected of me in the form of movies or media which talked about starting a family and being nurturing and a provider. Let me expand on that. Continue reading “Let’s Runaway”

Whose dreams are you working for?

We are creatures of habit. That doesn’t mean, because something is habitual that it has to be that way forever. We may be creatures of habit, but we are also adaptable. We have been doing in for years. Humanity has a lot of flaws, but no one can say that we have not learned to persevere. The reason I write this is, because we are so inclined to live in a way that does not make use of our fullest potential. We have grown accustomed to a lifestyle that validates ourselves, Continue reading “Whose dreams are you working for?”

A Journey

I have a problem. When I love someone, I give a love I know is seldom found somewhere else. This is not one of those things that I can’t prove with quantifiable means unless you count the number of times I make your heart beat in a minute per the lost amount of rushed breaths trying to catch air. Nor is it one of those things that you can physically see unless you choose to see the lack of conditions I hold above your head. The problem is not this. The problem is the fact that you took me for granted, or rather I let myself be taken for granted.

This is not a pity post. Continue reading “A Journey”

Why do we cheat?

I do not believe I have met a perfect person. I am certainly not even close to being that person, and you know what? I do not want to be. I have made my share of mistakes and I do not think I would be sitting in front of this computer screen today without having gone through the trials that I have. Without accepting the decisions I made, even the ones that ended up hurting myself and those closest to me, I would not be who I am.

I want to get into cheating, being unfaithful or simply put, Continue reading “Why do we cheat?”

My First Love

Yes, I am young, if my age is how you measure my experience. Yes, I am naive if my capacity to accept love is how you measure my intellect. Yes, I am awkward, if you measure that by my inability to accept conventional norms.

My first love taught me how to lose my breath. My first love taught me how to fall without one thought about the Continue reading “My First Love”