Today I am sad. Today, I need to be asked how I am a few times, because the first ten times you ask, I’ll probably lie. The eleventh time I’ll tear up, because the memories will hit stronger than the first ten times. Finally, after a couple more prods, when you ask the thirteenth time, I’ll give in to the desire to break down in tears. September 13th marks the anniversary of the birth of an angel who came and went from my life.
It’s funny, because I am not one to run from my feelings. In fact, I’m known to explore those feelings of hurt and encourage those around me to explore their own hurts and learn and grow from them as well. But, this one hurts a bit different from all the rest. This cut deeper. Time waits for no man or woman and in this case the saying is no less factual. Time passed and life kept moving. This little angel’s memory drifted further and further from my mind…like holding on to water in cupped hands. I no longer remember if her black curls were really as raven black as my memory recalls, or if her piercing gray eyes were the same shade as her grandmother’s?
Who she was to me is not important to you. Who she was to me and the place she held in my heart can no person ever hold ever again. Today I mourn a life gone too soon. Today I celebrate a spirit that was always dancing and exploring new adventures. This one is for you, my love…meri jot.
I’m going to layout my vulnerabilities for you tonight. I am a child. A novice. And I’ll be damned if I’m not proud of that. I get scared that in a world filled with tough exteriors, I may end up bumping into too many fake facades and get bruised up. It scares me, man. Continue reading “I’m a Child”
I have this fleeting notion of oblivion. An oblivion where time stands still and there is nothing more than the width between two parted lips. Here is the perfect moment. I read somewhere that sometimes even better than a first kiss are the few precious moments leading up to the kiss. Here, everything that was, will be no more. Here, there stands a moment of opportunity in time, where I and the lips that I am about to behold, will give light to a godly creation of our making. Continue reading “Oblivion”
My current most played music and inspirations for this post:
There’s a certain energy that encompasses your aura. See, we create a synergy that many will never witness in their lifetimes, let alone fathom. It doesn’t make sense, kind of like holding a flame in your hand, but somehow we ride that heatwave together. You made me question if I was happy where I was. You had me questioning it all. Continue reading “Music Got Me Feelin’ A Way”
Her hair lay sprawled
The moonlight seeped in gently
Caressing her flushed face and naked body
Moving slowly up, down, up, down
The tattoos on her body glistened
With the pale light of the moon Continue reading “Tattoos, Red Tints & the Moonlight”
In case you need a sign:
“God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.” Continue reading “Serenity and Signs”
I’m excited to hit the road tomorrow. Open road, fast car, me alone with my thoughts and good music filling the car. Traveling is a solitude for me. That being said, I want some suggestions on who I should listen to.
For sure “Revenge of the Dreamers III” will be listened to a few times lol
(“Oh Wow..Swerve” hit home too well…”I know it’s better to be asleep, that’s why we hate the alarm”…never want it to be this way. Wanna stay doing what I love so much, don’t even need an alarm, real life be feeling like a dream sometimes) I love listening to new albums on the road 😀
Side note, I am more prone to listening to hip hop or R&B/soul. I know I know, I should be more open-minded, but here we are lol
Anyways, leave your suggestions and new post coming either Sunday night or Monday!
The screen in front of me indicated I had an hour and a half until my flight took off. As I watched the minutes tick by the thoughts in my head began fighting for my attention. There were so many of them. It was as though each thought was an individual voice and they were all trying to make their voice the loudest in my mind. My heart was racing along with my thoughts, both trying to outrun the other. I brought my hand to my heart in a futile attempt to try to calm myself. The world began spinning.
I didn’t know what I was going to do. I had to make this flight. My breathing became shallow. I just had to make this flight. Continue reading “I Smile”
The first time I experienced death was when I was in, I believe, 3rd or 4th grade. I would have been about 9-10 years old. I was in India with my family, we were visiting and had flown out there for Continue reading “A life as a legacy”
It is written…I went on a journey to try and get back to my roots. I had booked a trip with no return flight home. I needed to go so far from here. I needed to breathe and every time I thought of home, it was visions of different places, waking up to a new sunrise in a new city. Continue reading “Maktub”