You ever meet someone who is so bound to the mistakes of the past that everything about them screams bitterness and resentment? Those people will never let you live down your mistakes. They’re the ones as soon as something goes wrong, they’ll throw punches to the gut of all the ways you were the worst human to have ever existed in the past. They’ll make sure when you are thriving, they get in a hit to make you suffer, to bring you right down to where they are suffering as well.
And then the silent ones. Or rather the not so silent ones. The ones who hold on to their hurts and let it manifest in ways to show the world exactly how resilient they are. How deeply unprovoked or untouched they are by someone having hurt them. So unfazed that they have to go online and make posts talking about unfazed they are.
I think the mark of a healthy person is how they choose to work their way through their trauma. At the end of the day, it is my personal and profound belief that when someone betrays our trust or has hurt us in some shape or form, we hold on to those pains in some shape or form until they manifest in one way or another in our lives. I was talking to a friend of mine and she said that we live in a culture nowadays where people want to act tough, like nothing fazes them, but in reality they are hurting. She said social media plays a big part in this mindset. People will go online and they’ll see these self-proclaimed self-help gurus telling you to focus on yourself and “detach and distance yourself from negative energy.” Which is great in theory, but in practice, not so much. Where do these traumas go once you’ve detached and distanced yourself? It is not healthy for the psyche to repress.
All I see are cycles of bitterness and resentment manifesting themselves in the shape of twitter and IG rants about how healthy people are, but behind closed doors they can’t even look at themselves in the mirror. I don’t want that for myself. And I want to say most people don’t want that for themselves either, however I think there’s sometimes something deeper as to why we lay awake at night scrolling aimlessly on our feeds.